IWC Connect Is Latest Luxury Smartstrap To Challenge Apple Watch

IWC Schaffhausen, one of the more well-regarded Swiss watch manufacturers of note (along with various others under the Richemont umbrella), has announced their unfortunate IWC Connect smartstrap. While the company seems pretty high up the ladder to stoop so low, they’re apparently proud of this thing. They explain it thus:

This intelligent tool, which will be embedded in the straps of mechanical timepieces from IWC, is designed to give wearers control over certain devices connected to the Internet of Things (IoT) and provide fully fledged activity tracking. …

Engineered to be integrated into the straps of IWC sports watches, beginning with the Big Pilot’s Watches, the IWC Connect answers the needs of discerning customers by providing a high-quality luxury design solution: it not only tracks the wearer’s activities, but also allows them to interact with connected devices in their environment (IoT).

It seems like the smartstrap idea, first popularized back in January by the Montblanc TimeWalker Urban Speed e-Strap (LoL), is starting to pick up support in the luxury world as a safe, cheap (but still stupid) way for Swiss makers to hedge the bet against the maybe-threat of Apple Watch. With this plan of action, even as IWC outsources development of the Connect, the brand hasn’t got to risk its “Swiss Made” label a la Tag Heuer’s amusing Android disaster, because all the digital functions (albeit there’s only a few of them) have been assigned accessory status. It’s an interesting strategy, but it’s hardly compelling, as it adds stiffness and heft to the traditional watch-wearing experience without sufficiently shedding the obvious, anti-luxury nature of the me-too concept’s very existence.

As far as how the IWC Connect works, the company’s teaser video leaves a lot to the imagination:

Is that a touchscreen? Is it even a screen at all? Are there various environmental sensors inside? Is there onboard GPS? Can it really offer “fully fledged activity tracking” without a heart rate monitor? Does it need a smartphone tether to function properly? Will it have apps? How much does it cost? When is it available? Does IWC even make a Captain’s line where this silly little porthole might not look so totally out of place?

Of course, the answers to all those questions don’t really matter. The IWC Connect, like all luxury smartstraps, is doomed.

I’m just waiting to hear about Rolex’s new smartwhatever. Fortunately, I’ll probably have to keep waiting, because I think that particular brand understands that the best way to compete with Apple Watch is to ignore it altogether.